Effective Communication

     My mom exhibited great communication skills.  She would ask a probing question and then wait for a response.  She would never interrupt the speaker. I can remember telling her that I wanted to quit school in the 9^th grade.  She smiled and said that it was alright with her.  I then looked puzzled because she did not respond the way I expected her to.  Before I would quit she would have to have a loooong talk with me.  I was afraid of the unknown of this conversation.  She asked me why I wanted to quit school.  I responded that I was tired of waking up rushing to catch the bus and that school is boring.  I told her my grades were okay and I could just take and pass the GED.  She listened without judgment.  I continued with my nonsense, she listened.  Toward the end of the conversation, she asked me what kind of job I was going to get and how was I going to get there. I had not thought past the moment.  She provoked me to think about my future.  During the conversation, she communicated verbally and non-verbally.  She supplied feedback and she did not demean my thoughts.  After talking with her, I decided that finishing school would be the best choice for me.

   I have learned from my mom and yes I am attempting to become an effective communicator like she was.  She was effective because she listened, kept eye contact and did not appear to be judgmental.  As I became older, I would say, “Mom, I want to be just like you when I grow up!” She was a sympathetic caring listener who expects people to make the choices that would be a benefit for self.  She always made sure that any person who she spoke to would know that she cared for them.   I think she was a role model that I want to one day follow. 

Considerations, Reflections, Aspirations

Considerations, Reflections, Aspirations

     This course has been AMAZING!  Of all of the courses that I have taken at Walden Univ., I am so impressed and grateful with the responses and support that I have received from my colleagues.  This course was a bit difficult for me because I had undergone Carpal Tunnel surgery.  I had to motivate myself to stay on the ball because, I expected nothing less than the best in spite of my physical situation.  I gained  so much support from my colleagues. As I reviewed the responses of my colleagues, I’ve concluded they truly know how to lend support.  Thanks guys because you and my sons are my motivation!

 

     My professional and personal opinion for all children and families is that no matter what their background, sexual orientation, race, creed, ethics, religion, demographics or culture is that one day all PEOPLE can be treated equal.  This is my hope and goal in which I will utilize as the premise of issues related to diversity, equity and social justice in the early childhood field.

 

 

Tammy StreichFebruary 24, 2013 at 6:23 AM

I like your idea about hanging the country's flag and asking the family to volunteer to come in and associate with all the kids. What better way to learn about ones country coming straight from the people who know. Good post!

 

Jennifer BisignanoFebruary 24, 2013 at 7:27 AM

I love this idea. If I were to pick this country I think I would also incorporate the music, food and local traditions. Amazing job.

Jennifer Bisignano

 

Stacy PerryFebruary 24, 2013 at 2:36 PM

I love how you started your blog in first person. It made me want to read more! All of your ideas to make the families feel comfortable were amazing and I know they would truly be helpful! I fully agree with the quote you posted from the book! ""Teachers who create learning environments that incorporate and build upon children's home cultures promote healthy social, emotional, and cognitive development and academic achievement" (2010, p. 61)."
Thanks for the reminder!

 

Janell LawrenceFebruary 24, 2013 at 3:38 PM

Yolanda,
You had great ideas. I like how you would invite the child to teach some songs or finger plays about his culture. That sounds like a really good idea. I also like how you began by writing in first person. It made your blog very realistic.

Janell Lawrence
Beaumont, Ca
Site Supervisor

 

Jennifer BisignanoFebruary 17, 2013 at 11:15 AM

I think the interesting thing about both of these events that you experienced it that it led you here. The grandfather was obviously a bigot and so was the teacher. It is amazing what you over came. Kudos to you

 

Janell LawrenceFebruary 17, 2013 at 8:00 PM

Yolanda,
That is ridiculous that a light skinned black man would be prejudiced against people, especially children, when he was in such an admirable position. As for your friends grandparent, he should have kept his opinion to himself. At least he didn't go any farther and disallow you from being friends with her. Thank you for sharing such personal situations.

 

 

 

Tammy StreichFebruary 20, 2013 at 2:17 PM

Very sad Yolanda, but you didn’t want to tattle tell anyway, thinking back. This and other reasons remind us of why we want to make a change. We need to treat all children as equals and hopefully they will grow up and do the same. I always stress the Golden Rule, do onto others as you want them to do onto you. If more people lived by this “Code” the world would be a better place. It’s our mission to make the world a better place and we are better people for living through such life challenges. By the way I have a life friend and she spells her name Jolanda.

 

Jennifer BisignanoJanuary 31, 2013 at 6:58 PM

I am so sorry that you had that awful experience. This reminds of a movie that was out years ago called school daze by Spike Lee. It is really sad women are still judged on the color of their skin.

 

 

Trichelle WilliamsFebruary 2, 2013 at 4:38 AM

Unfortunately, microaggressions are a constant reality for people of color. It is sad to know that in this day and age, people are still being judged by the color of their skin. Yes, racism exists even within one’s own race. I am so sorry about your experience. I was hoping that you would pledge and use the opportunity to combat microaggressions against women of color.

Marie February 3, 2013 at 4:10 PM

Wow! Good for you for taking a stand and not pledging to that sorority! I believe that we all have a place in this world, sometimes I wonder how exactly to find it, but I know it's out there!It is so hard to teach children about being nice when there are so many "not nice" people out there!

Zena SaraiFebruary 3, 2013 at 9:11 PM

I was personal invited to join that sorority in 1999 when I was in undergrad. I am dark skinned. They don't really follow that brown paper bag rule anymore but most of them are light in complexion. Now they choose people based on class or economic status or privilege. I didn't join that sorority because I did not feel good about it. I really hate how light skin black people can get White privilege because of their lighter skin. This brings such a divide among Black people.

Welcoming Families From Around the World

      Welcome! Hi my name is Mrs. Honore’ and I am your teacher. I am so glad that you will be a part of our class. If you have any questions, please let me know and I will try to find the answer for you. This is Jamie; she will be your class buddy. She is five years old and knows a lot about our school and the other students.   I understand that you moved here from Nigeria because your father’s company transferred him to the U.S.A. Please feel free to tell us about Nigeria, your customs, religion, school, holidays or any other facts that will help us to get to know you.  As Derman-Sparks & Edwards asserted: "Teachers who create learning environments that incorporate and build upon children's home cultures promote healthy social, emotional, and cognitive development and academic achievement" (2010, p. 61).

     To ensure that I am culturally responsive to the new student I will:

·        Learn a few Nigerian words and phrases to greet the student.

·        Research cultural roles, hierarchy and  religious beliefs via the Internet, scholarly journals, and international professional contacts

·        Display familiar artifacts, flags, traditional food, clothing and pictures of Nigerian people throughout the classroom setting

·        Do a home visit to learn about the child and his role in the family and intimate facts about the child.

·        Encourage the family to visit the school, volunteer and become familiar with the educational system.

·        Invite the child to teach the class a native song, traditional nursery rhyme, or a hand game which is played in his native country.

I believe these simple preparations will help the child and his family will to feel more comfortable in this new environment and prepare the child to learn.  This warm welcome will assure  the family that the teacher cares for and will provide a safe academic and nurturing environment for the child.  What do you think?

References:

Derman-Sparks, L. & Edwards, J. (2010).  Anti-Bias for Young Children and Ourselves. National Association for the Education of Young Children: Washington, DC.

The Personal Side of Bias, Prejudice, and Oppression

“Are you sure that is your friend?”

     As a young child, I attended a very small elementary school.  The racial mix of students was black and white only.  In order to maintain discipline before school took in, our principal would assign children to “take names.”  That is, take names of the students who didn’t obey the rules.  When I knew he would choose a student for that task, I always raised my hand to be called upon.  Much to my surprise, I was never called upon.  Each time, I would raise my hand thinking I would one day have the opportunity.  I was never ever called upon. Years later, it was brought to my attention the only students who were called upon to "take names" were white or light complexioned students. I was being discriminated against and didn’t even know it.  I realized that discrimination existed but I never thought my, “black” principal would be a part of such a discriminatory act. By the way, he was light complexion and most of the students would say that he was white.

     In high school, I was very good friends with Stacy.  We did everything together- played in the band, were members of the flag corps, played sports and talked on the phone all of the time.  I was raised be a single Black hardworking mother.  Stacy benefited from a SNAP, which also included her grandparents.  They owned a gas station. One day Stacy and I were going out of town to a festival. Before we were to leave, Stacy’s dad had promised to fill up our car if I agreed to drive.  (Gas was only about $1.40 per gallon.) When I approached the house/gas station, Stacy filled the car up with gas.  Her grandfather asked where is the money? Stacy said, “That is my friend Paw Paw.” He said, “Are you sure that is your friend?” I realized that her grandfather did not expect white Stacy to have a black friend. 

     In both examples, I was diminished as a person.  First of all, I was demeaned because of my dark complexion and secondly, a grandparent was not accepting of his granddaughter having a Black friend.  In the school setting, I didn’t quite have any feelings because I didn’t initially realize that I was being discriminated against.  When it was brought to my attention, I became angry because my mom openly talked about people treating people the same. I would have done a great job taking names because I knew how to tattle.  Taking names was just a glorified way to tattle. 

     When I think about a way to create a greater opportunity for equity for each situation, I tried to give each situation equal opportunity. First, I think the principal could have given each group of children the opportunity to “take names.” Also, it should not have bothered me because my main focus should have been to keep my name off of the list. Secondly, I should have been proud that my friend spoke up for me and left it as that.  The grandfather should have minded his own business.  Even though we did not pay for the gas on that day, my mother frequently patronized their gas station because it was one of the few full service stations in our rural area.

Practicing Awareness of Microaggression

     As an undergraduate student, I wanted to pledge to become a member of a Greek sorority.  I observed all sororities on the campus.  I was impressed with one in particular.  I called my mom and told her of my intentions.  She replied to me, “You won’t be accepted if you are not lighter than a brown paper bag.” She explained to me that I needed to get a paper bag and compare my skin color to the bag to determine if my skin color will allow me to meet that requirement.  I could not believe what I was hearing.  I said to myself, “Surely times have changed.” I went to the “Rush” for that sorority and I noticed that all of the ladies had light skin color and all of the perspective pledgees were of the same characteristic.  I left the Rush and asked one of my friends who had a dark complexion how did she become a member.  She laughed and said my mom is a light skinned  member and sits on the national board.  I called my mom and told her that she was correct.  This experience was awful.  I asked myself what in the world does the color of my skin have to do with me being in a club.   I felt marginalized especially because I was discriminated by own people.    From that experience, I chose not to pledge at all. This was an example of a microassault, strictly on the basis of my skin complexion.  This incident occurred in 1984.  Can you answer this question for me? Here are pictures of my niece and my son?   Do you think they would be able to join the sorority if they were both female? Use the brown paper bag as a guide.

     Additionally, I have noticed this sorority is more accepting of darker complexions now a days.  Good for them!

     Then I learned a hard lesson about discrimination.  Do you realize that certain groups discriminate within the group?  My thoughts were I tried to join a black female sorority and was discriminated against because I was too black to join.  Go figure?

Perspectives on Diversity and Culture

Perspectives on Diversity and Culture

Amanda

What is your definition of culture?

Culture is how people do things.  For example, the way a person wears their hair, body language, foods and holidays.

What is your definition of diversity?

When I think of diversity, I think of how people are different.  For example, how people are different.

Holly

What is your definition of culture?

Culture is an appreciation of fine arts, humanities

What is your definition of diversity?

Diversity in the classroom means students from different walks of life. Like race, ethnicity, sexual orientation etc.

****************************************************

Ian

What is your definition of culture?

Culture has to do with where a person is from, what values they have and uphold, how they judge the world and how they raise their kids.

What is your definition of diversity?

Diversity is different and unique.

******************************************************

      According to the authors of the text, “Culture refers to how particular groups live.  It is the way we eat, sleep, talk, play, care for the sick, relate to one another, think about work, arrange our kitchens and remember the dead” (Derman-Sparks, Edwards, 2011). I think Amanda’s definition came very close to what the authors say culture is because she said “It is how people do things.” Ian assumed “it was the way people raise their kids.” Comparably, I think each participant in this questionnaire expressed valid points concerning culture.   No one spoke of deep and surface culture.  From my readings, I gather surface culture is what I can observe whereas deep culture has a root which is not easily observed. 

     It appears  all participants said diversity had to do with different.  One person added unique as well.  I  thought that was a good analogy because uniqueness does have its roots in diversity.   Holly gave an example of sexual orientation, I had not thought of using this as an example of diversity. 

     From this short questionnaire, if I were to solicit more responses to the questions, I probably would have a greater variety or varying degrees of this definitions.   Personally, I have noted that cultural diversity in Language in public places.  I can remember a time when English was the  ONLY  Language printed for public views.  Now recognizing the inflow of many cultures into the United States, I observe a multitude of Language printed for Americans to view.  For example, I was in the Social Security Office, the Department of Motor Vehicle and the Office of Family Services offices and noted Spanish, French and Vietnamese Languages printed on materials.  Look how far the U. S. has come without saying, look how far we still need to go.   

Reference

Derman-Sparks, L. & Edwards, J. (2010).  Anti-Bias for Young Children and Ourselves. National Association for the Education of Young Children: Washington, DC.

My Family Culture

EXTRA! EXTRA! READ ALL ABOUT IT!

     A series of Tsunamis have completely devastated the infrastructure of the United States of America.  In an effort to assist the country, other countries are willing to accept refugees. 

     My children and I have barely survived the devastating events.  What will do? Where will we go? Which country will accept us? Permanent residents in another country, how will we survive? Refugees, is that what we are now called? My mind is racing a million miles a minute! I have been given the daunting task of packing one set of clothing for each us.  Additionally, I am able to take only three small items with us.  What we take?

     For starters, we will take a bible.  God has given us his word to live and grow by.  We will use the Word to guide us through a daily devotional study.  If allowed, we will share our faith.  We will memorize scripture to teach and comfort us when we think that we are unable to make it through this catastrophe.  We will use the teachings of the disciples to teach us how to live, love and grow. 

     Secondly, I will take a family portrait of us to help remember what was normal to us.  We will collectively reminisce of the time we took the picture, where we were going and why we were going there.  This is a picture of me and my twin boys.  We were about to go to church to worship God.  After the service, we went to Chucky Cheese’s for an outing.  Just a regular Sunday filled with sharing and fun times—a sense of normalcy.

     Finally, we would take my boys’ favorite book “Five Little Monkey’s!” I read this book so much to my boys when they were infants by the time they were able to speak; they were reading it to me as my night time story.  Now at four years old, they find high frequency words in the book.  Literacy has been a part of their lives early. 

     As we approach the border of the country—we cannot even identify where we are—we overhear others saying that we cannot bring anything but our clothing and one personal item.  I panic! I hurriedly prepare myself to leave everything but the picture but then I have lost it in all of the rush.  The reason I chose to leave the other items are because I believe we have enough scripture in our hearts for us to remain faithful to God.  Leaving the boys book would be okay to leave because we have memorized it anyway.

     From this activity, I have learned that to be blessed with a loving family would be all that I need to make a new start in a foreign land.  Things are nice but things can always be replaced.  Our love for each other will help us through the tough times and the good times.

Yolonda Honore'
Houma, LA
Special Education Teacher,
2nd - 6th Grades